Currently listening to: Taylor Swift – All Too Well
Back to the jail life indeed….
Anti-social to the max T__T
Well, maybe not.
Anti-social on my own terms though.
I just finished another poorly written essay that is due in 20 minutes.
I am tired of the song now.
Grace Potter & The Nocturnals – Apologies.
I think I listened to it 100 times on repeat just today.
This weekend was really busy actually.
Yet I feel like there was so much time I just spent doing nothing because I was stuck.
I really dislike writer’s block.
In those moments, you just have no idea how to convey your ideas (if you even have any at all) and you are just so lost.
It’s like where do you even begin ?
They say to just begin anywhere but that doesn’t work out too well for me sometimes. Then, my essay would REALLY be all over the place.
I missed the 6th CHRTC class on friday.
Terrible.
I slept in again.
It hasn’t happened for awhile but it’s starting up again.
Good thing there’s only a week and a half before classes end.
I feel bad though because they did teacher evaluations that day.
I wonder if my teacher ever thinks that I skip her class on purpose.
I really don’t !
Apparently cyncyn didn’t go either though. I don’t remember if she told me why. I don’t feel fully grounded these days.
“My head is up in space.”
Then I had work.
I got to work /w Yang again. I think I kind of freaked out at work because something wasn’t done right.
These days it seems I have no patience.
I hope Yang didn’t take it personally.. because I totally did not mean to blame her for anything, I was more worried about the consequences of having not done something right and if it was fixable.
Luckily, we did manage fixing the issue so it was okay.
I think I am really tired these days because I don’t get enough sleep.
And still I stay up so late.
I don’t know why I can’t make myself go to bed.
My guess is that I am stressed.
I actually do feel stressed this week. I feel so antsy, like I need to get going now because there’s so many things to do.
But still there is a lack of motivation which is due to fear.
Fear of not doing well.
If anyone can recall, last year I hid in my room every other day because I was too afraid to go to one of my classes.
Yep, it’s that feeling.
This term it’s been a lot better because I’ve managed to control that fear but sometimes I accidentally let it slip and that it’s on the loose so I have to catch it again.
After work, I went over to Anh’s to hang out with her.
Her place is actually so nice !
Her facilities include a workout room, theatre and a swimming pool.
Our small group may possibly use that space to hang out sometime.
Anh taught me to knit again and now I can’t put it down.
I think knitting is very destressing but time consuming.
We watched Charlie St. Cloud ft. Zac Efron that night. It was okay, kind of strange because it involves being able to see ghosts.
I ended up staying over that night because we were talking for a long time and it got quite late.
I wonder if I told her a little too much about myself..
Although I did find a lot more about her as well.
She asked me many questions and I answered pretty much all of them fully.
I told her my testimony because she wasn’t there during the small group when C Shu and I shared our testimonies. It was like a 3 hr testimony.
At least it wasn’t 5 hrs…
Saturday morning I ended up talking to Anh more and didn’t end up leaving til around 2 pm.
Then I had to go home and get ready for small groups and the crafts fair.
I went to the crafts fair in St. Albert with a few ppl.
It was pretty neat that everything was DIY. The stuff they sold was a bit pricey because of that though.
I got this cool harmonica necklace that you can actually play. It’s just super difficult because it’s so tiny.
Small groups was alright, C Shu and I could have been a little more prepared but I was really happy that Anh came.
I left right after GIFT even though I wanted to hang out.
I wasn’t sure if ppl were hanging out and who was driving so I just decided that if someone could drive me home then I’d just go home.
I caught a ride /w Clara, I hadn’t seen her in awhile so I was happy I got to see her.
She’s still a bit sick so that is still something to pray for.
I have a feeling she’s not eating very healthily.. =S
Sunday morning was an ordeal.
I didn’t know I had a ride /w Mikey so I thought I was going to have to miss Margie’s baptism.
When I woke up it was already around 11 am so I was really lucky actually.
We made it in time to see her baptism. Yes, I ended up going.
It was a big celebration, unfortunately I didn’t get to meet her parents.
I really wanted to meet her mom !
I rushed home afterwards to try and work on my essay but I just couldn’t focus..
It was actually kind of frustrating.
It took the whole afternoon/night.
This week is going to be hell, oh God please be with me.
My last midterm of the semester is on Tuesday. I still have one more chapter left to read/take notes on and 4 chapter exams to do. Thursday night I have my first final.
*Diary of a Fish 